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Stinky D  / Sabrina Mcneil (Mom)  Read >>
Stinky D  / Sabrina Mcneil (Mom)
Why why why does this time of year affect me so much. It shouldn't be any different. The holidays always feel like May. I took my anger out on the treadmill this morning and a song came on that reminded me of you. It goes " I won't fall, I am titanium". All your little body went through and now, in my heart I know, you are as strong as ever. I love you baby. I was due for a good cry. Love MOM 11/10/12 Close
Life is an Echo  / Sabrina McNeil (Mom)  Read >>
Life is an Echo  / Sabrina McNeil (Mom)
Life is an echo. What you send out comes back. What you sow you reap. What you give you get. What you see in others exists in you. Remember life is an echo. It always gets back to you. (Unknown ) Close
Along the Road  / Sheryl Bittle (Friend)  Read >>
Along the Road  / Sheryl Bittle (Friend)

Read this today Sabrina...thought of you....and knew you would understand :)

Along the Road  by Robert Browning Hamilton

I walked a mile with Pleasure:

She chattered all the way,

But left me none the wiser

For all she had to say.

I walked a mile with Sorrow

And ne'er a word said she;

But oh, the things I learned from her

When Sorrow walked with me!

 

Blessings to you and Marcus :)

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Stinky D  / Sabrina McNeil (Mom)  Read >>
Stinky D  / Sabrina McNeil (Mom)
For some reason today I thought I would torture myself and go back and read all the Stinky D entry's from when I first started writing to today. I guess I felt the need for a good cry. Reading what I wrote felt like it all happened yesterday. What a roller coaster. I honestly can say the lows aren't as low as often and the highs are higher more often. But then there are times like last night when the image of you seizing just pops in my mind and I fall into a deep sorrow, crying myself to sleep. I love you Dylan. As much today as The moment I learned I was pregnant with you, the moment I held you for the first time, for the last time. I don't dream about you as often, and that upsets me. I still kiss you goodnight every night and blow you a kiss when one of your songs come on my iPod. As I write this 2 of your songs came on in a row. Do I still believe in signs? Yes I do. I miss you baby, and my heart still hurts everyday. But mommy is doing ok. Just like they said I would. Love you always and forever, until we see each other again, watch over your brother and sister. Love MOM. 10/9/12 Close
Stinky D  / Sabrina Mcneil (Mom)  Read >>
Stinky D  / Sabrina Mcneil (Mom)
Feeling a little, ok, a lot...emotional today. You would have started kindergarten today. Brother is back in school and we have reached new territory. I am home with a 2 year old. I told Ryan this morning that every morning God gives a choice on what kind of day we will have no matter our circumstances. I choose happiness. Through the joy and the tears, I choose happiness. I love you my big kindergartener. Though I think you have passed that stage already in knowledge of life. Love MOM. 8/27/12 Close
Stinky D  / Sabrina McNeil (mom)  Read >>
Stinky D  / Sabrina McNeil (mom)
Daddy and I heard this song and both thought of you. Wish you were here with us. ..."I'm here without you baby But you're still on my lonely mind I think about you baby And I dream about you all the time I'm here without you baby But you're still with me in my dreams..." ( 3 Doors Down) Love MOM 8/12/12 Close
Stinky D  / Sabrina McNeil (Mom)  Read >>
Stinky D  / Sabrina McNeil (Mom)
Your song came on as I pulled up to a car that had "Not of this World" in the window. As I looked over at the car a little blonde boy was smiling at me. It made me laugh and cry. Thank you for the sign/reminder. It puts me back on track of where I need to focus. Love you. Love MOM 8/1/12 Close
Stinky D  / Sabtina McNeil (mom)  Read >>
Stinky D  / Sabtina McNeil (mom)
Today your sister turns two years old. I cant even describe the emotions we are feeling. This day has been in the backs of our minds since she was born. This week and especially yesterday i kept replaying your timeline in my mind. 2 years went by so fast. Its hard to believe that that was all the time we had with you. I was so afraid she was always going to be compared to you. I was also afraid you would be forgotten. She looks like all of us. And she has her own little personality. I look at her today and tears fall. Tears of love. Tears of joy. I love you baby boy. Love MOM 6/22/12 Close
Stinky D  / Sabrina McNeil (Mom)  Read >>
Stinky D  / Sabrina McNeil (Mom)
Happy birthday baby!!! 5 years old. I remember the day like it was yesterday. About 10 days early. So eager to get here we barely made it to the hospital. Breathing so fast they had to put you in the NICU. I refused to leave your side. I don't need to rest I need to be with my baby boy. Always feared but never actually thought I would be there again at your bedside 2 yrs later. Praying for you to breathe. This week has been a roller coaster. Yesterday I final crashed hard. Thought there were no more tears left in me... And then I woke up this morning, and started all over again. I never want today to be sad. It should be a happy celebration of life. And I celebrate and I hurt. And I love you more then words could ever describe. Happy Birthday baby. I hope your party is huge and full of balloons. Stomp a flower or 2. Do your Stinky D dance. And know my heart is always with you. Love MOM 5/14/2012 Close
To You...On Mothers Day  / Sabrina Mcneil (mom)  Read >>
To You...On Mothers Day  / Sabrina Mcneil (mom)
Its hard to find the right words to convey What i wish for you on Mothers Day Words of compassion filled with care? Knowing full well of the bond we share So on this day I wish for you.... Beautiful rainbows in the rain Joy and laughter instead of pain Sunshine on a cloudy day Faith to help you guide the way Most of all I wish you this... A touch a whisper a gentle kiss Just for you and filled with love Sent from an angel up above. (June Bertagnolli) Close
So Or Day for Dylan-May 3rd  / Sabrina McNeil (Mom)  Read >>
So Or Day for Dylan-May 3rd  / Sabrina McNeil (Mom)
Visit any of these locations and a portion of the proceeds will go to St Jude Children's Research Hospital. Your support could save a life! Thursday May 3rd Dutch Bros ( all Jackson Co) Yogurt Hut ( Medford Ashland & Grants Pass) Roadhouse Grill ( Medford) Real Deals (Medford) Thank you for your support! Marcus & Sabrina Close
Stinky D  / Sabrina Mcneil (mom)  Read >>
Stinky D  / Sabrina Mcneil (mom)
Easter always feels like the beginning of the end. The last pictures i have of you as you are at Easter time. I can feel myself becoming anxious. Your days will be here soon, and soon after, your sisters second birthday. I feel as if i am waiting for the next punch. She reminds me of you daily. A little of her brother peeks out in that new stink eye look she has been giving. Always wanting to go outside with daddy. But then she shows me how she is also diffrent by loving the cat. Mothers Day falls on the day you passed this year. Lovely. Should be interesting. Feels like a blessing and a cruel joke all wrapped up in one. I love you and miss you, Dylan. You are always on my mind and in my heart. Love, MOM 4/4/12 Close
Missing you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!-!  / Chanel Groom (Friend)  Read >>
Missing you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!-!  / Chanel Groom (Friend)

Just got home from the sand dunes, I thought of you! I remember you blonde hair and adorable little smile! I saw a little boy there that looked just like you we were camping with him. It made me smile, because of his blonde hair and cute little smile. I miss you so much little D!!!!!!!!

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Tomorrow will be kinder-Secret Sisters  / Sabrina McNeil (mom)  Read >>
Tomorrow will be kinder-Secret Sisters  / Sabrina McNeil (mom)
Black Clouds Are Behind Me I Now Can See Ahead Often I Wonder Why I Try Hoping For An End Sorrow Weighs My Shoulders Down And Trouble Haunts My Mind But I Know The Present Will Not Last And Tomorrow Will Be Kinder Tomorrow Will Be Kinder It's True I've Seen It Before A Brighter Day Is Comin' My Way Yes Tomorrow Will Be Kinder Today I've Cried A Many Tear And Pain Is In My Heart Around Me Lies A Sumber Scene I Don't Know Where To Start But I Feel Warmth On My Skin The Stars Have All Aligned The Wind Has Blown But Now I Know That Tomorrow Will Be Kinder Tomorrow Will Be Kinder I Know I've Seen It Before A Brighter Day Is Coming My Way Yes Tomorrow Will Be Kinder A Brighter Day Is Coming My Way Yes Tomorrow Will Be Kinder Close
Dare you to move lyrics-Switchfoot  / Sabrina McNeil (Mom)  Read >>
Dare you to move lyrics-Switchfoot  / Sabrina McNeil (Mom)
This song always reminds me of you. Love you baby. Love MOM 3/21/12 Welcome to the planet Welcome to existence Everyone's here Everyone's here Everybody's watching you now Everybody waits for you now What happens next What happens next [Chorus] I dare you to move I dare you to move I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor I dare you to move I dare you to move Like today never happened Today never happened before Welcome to the fallout Welcome to resistance The tension is here Tension is here Between who you are and who you could be Between how it is and how it should be [Chorus] Maybe redemption has stories to tell Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell Where can you run to escape from yourself? Where you gonna go? Where you gonna go? Salvation is here I dare you to move I dare you to move I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor I dare you to move I dare you to move Like today never happened Today never happened Today never happened Today never happened before Close
Joseph's Lullaby-Mercy Me  / Sabrina McNeil (mom)  Read >>
Joseph's Lullaby-Mercy Me  / Sabrina McNeil (mom)
Go to sleep my Son
This manger for your bed
You have a long road before You
Rest Your little head
Can You feel the weight of Your glory?
Do You understand the price?
Or does the Father guard Your heart for now
So You can sleep tonight?
Go to sleep my Son
Go and chase Your dreams
This world can wait for one more moment
Go and sleep in peace
I believe the glory of Heaven
Is lying in my arms tonight
But Lord, I ask that He for just this moment
Simply be my child
Go to sleep my Son
Baby, close Your eyes
Soon enough You'll save the day
But for now, dear Child of mine
Oh my Jesus, Sleep tight

(This song reminds me of the last time I held you. I love Dylan. You have touched so many lives. My little baby boy. Merry Christmas sweetie. )Love, MOM 12/20/2011


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Letter From Heaven  / Sabrina McNeil (mom)  Read >>
Letter From Heaven  / Sabrina McNeil (mom)
To my dearest family, some things I'd like to say...

but first of all, to let you know, that I arrived okay.

I'm writing this from heaven. Here I dwell with God above.

Here, there's no more tears of sadness; here is just eternal love.



Please do not be unhappy just because I'm out of sight.

Remember that I'm with you every morning, noon and night.

That day I had to leave you when my life on earth was through,

God picked me up and hugged me and He said, "I welcome you."



It's good to have you back again; you were missed while you were gone.

As for your dearest family, they'll be here later on.

I need you here badly; you're part of my plan.

There's so much that we have to do, to help our mortal man."



God gave me a list of things, that he wished for me to do.

And foremost on the list, was to watch and care for you.

And when you lie in bed at night, the day's chores put to flight.

God and I are closest to you....in the middle of the night.



When you think of my life on earth, and all those loving years

because you are only human, they are bound to bring you tears.

But do not be afraid to cry; it does relieve the pain.

Remember there would be no flowers, unless there was some rain.



I wish that I could tell you all that God has planned.

But if I were to tell you, you wouldn't understand.

But one thing is for certain, though my life on earth is o'er.

I'm closer to you now, than I ever was before.



There are many rocky roads ahead of you and many hills to climb;

but together we can do it by taking one day at a time.

It was always my philosophy and I'd like it for you too...

that as you give unto the world, the world will give to you.



If you can help somebody who's in sorrow and pain,

then you can say to God at night......"My day was not in vain."

And now I am contented....that my life has been worthwhile,

knowing as I passed along the way, I made somebody smile.



So if you meet somebody who is sad and feeling low,

just lend a hand to pick him up, as on your way you go.

When you're walking down the street, and you've got me on your mind;

I'm walking in your footsteps only half a step behind.



And when it's time for you to go.... from that body to be free,

remember you're not going.....you're coming here to me.

~Author~

Ruth Ann Mahaffey

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Lyrics to God Gave Me You-Blake Shelton  / Sabrina McNeil (mom)  Read >>
Lyrics to God Gave Me You-Blake Shelton  / Sabrina McNeil (mom)
Lyrics to God Gave Me You :
[Blake Shelton - Verse 1]
I’ve been a walking heartache
I’ve made a mess of me
The person that I’ve been lately
Ain’t who I wanna be

But you stay here right beside me
Watch as the storm goes through
And I need you

[Chorus]
God gave me you for the ups and downs
God gave me you for the days of doubt
For when I think I’ve lost my way
There are no words here left to say, it’s true
God gave me you

[Blake Shelton - Verse 2]
There’s more here than what were seeing
A divine conspiracy
That you, an angel lovely
Could somehow fall for me
You’ll always be love’s great martyr
Ill be the flattered fool
And I need you

[Chorus]
God gave me you for the ups and downs
God gave me you for the days of doubt
For when I think I’ve lost my way
There are no words here left to say, it’s true
God gave me you

[Bridge]
On my own I’m only
Half of what I could be
I can’t do without you
We are stitched together
And what love has tethered
I pray we never undo

[Chorus - Outro]
God gave me you for the ups and downs
God gave me you for the days of doubt
God gave me you for the ups and downs
God gave me you for the days of doubt
For when I think I’ve lost my way
There are no words here left to say, it’s true
God gave me you, gave me you
Gave me you


Love you!! Close
New Information from COMO  / Sabrina McNeil (mom)  Read >>
New Information from COMO  / Sabrina McNeil (mom)
Bacterial meningitis, all ages US:

An estimated 500 deaths from 4100 cases of
bacterial meningitis annually(2003-2007)

(Thigpen MC et al. N Engl J Med. 2011;364(21):2016-25.) Close
One Day  / Gramma Rose   Read >>
One Day  / Gramma Rose

My Little Monkey

One day we will be together again.    We will Laugh Play and Reminisce of our special time together.  Then we will Laugh Play Give Big Hugs & Kisses Forever.  One day closer to you.

I Love and Miss you always

Ma-Maa

 

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